A Challenge to ALL Christians...Including Myself

"And one of the scribes came up and heard them disputing with one another, and seeing that he answered them well, asked him, “Which commandment is the most important of all?” 29 Jesus answered, “The most important is, ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. 30 And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ 31 The second is this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.”

Not to beat the dead horse, but I don't think I have gotten through to everyone I've talked to about this...including myself.

What does it mean to love your neighbor as yourself? Does it mean that we Christians should do service projects to help the poor, serve soup at the homeless shelter or talk to an ailing acquaintance? Well yes but that's not full. It's not a command of convenient service; it's a command of a lifestyle. Are you loving your neighbor as yourself?

If you have ever interacted with another human being, you know how much it sucks to talk to someone when your day has been horrible. The last thing you want is for them to question your attitude or come down on you for something you might have misspoken. Who are they to get frustrated with you - they don't know what kind of day you've had. However, that's what we humans, eh Christians, do so often. We are quick to judge and point fingers when we don't know the backstory to the facade. Why do we quickly think differently about someone just because they have a different color of skin? How did you react when the waitress wasn't cordial? Did you make a cunning remark to your friend? When you walked by that guy with long black hair, mascara, and a marilyn manson t-shirt, did you look in disgust? Did you scoff at the 18-year old girl carrying a baby?

I have, and you may have done one or more of these. It sounds so elementary to say this, but we aren't loving these people as we ought. Why are we so inclined to judge people when we don't know what's going on in their lives? By that, I mean why do I do this? Sure, if asked what we should do, we will give the right answers, but rarely will we act accordingly. I am not saying that every (or any) reader is necessarily doing this, because that would be quite ironic; however, I can only challenge you (us) to maintain an attitude in accordance with this idea.

So what does it mean to love your neighbor as yourself? I'm glad you asked, because I am about to unwrap it from what I think it means. Whenever we come across someone that automatically is different from us in any way, the most important thing to not do is to not pass judgement. This takes work for most of us. We don't know if the goth guy passing us was abused, neglected or is just rebellious. We don't know why the 18 year-old girl has a kid. At that, does it matter? Second, we have to give the person the benefit of the doubt, put ourselves in their shoes, and act accordingly. I know so many people will easily read over this, think to themselves, "Yeah, I've heard this ever since Sunday School in kindergarten," but for those of you whom this resonates, let it resonate deeper.

One popular book within the Christian circles (which I know has been heard outside of Christian circles) is one speaking of the 5 love languages. For those of you who don't know what the 5 love languages are, I will explain: according to the author, Dr. Chapman, every person has at least one love language to which they respond. The 5 love languages are physical touch, words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, and gifts. His argument is that there are so many unhappy relationships, because a lot of people's spouses are not giving their respective spouse the love language that suits him or her. In other words, a person who is most receptive to physical touch but whose spouse gives infinite gifts, which the receptive spouse couldn't care less, the gift-giving spouse is missing the point. We don't need to give the type of love we want to give, but we need to give the type of love that the recipient will be the most receptive.

There goes another one of my random tangents that has nothing to do with anything. True, except this is how it applies to loving our neighbor as ourself. I myself am one who enjoys conversation, relationship building and a good shoulder to lean on, but I can't necessarily offer those to those around me. I take the 5 love languages principle and apply it to the love-your-neighbor-as-yourself principle. While a homeless man might need food and an unwed 18-year old mother might need a place of refuge and an abused kid might need a listening ear and a kid in africa might need medical aid, we all need a different type of love. Fortunately and unfortunately the secular world often puts the Christian world to shame in this category. I am so ashamed of myself when I pass by someone who I later realize I could have talked to. I am so embarrassed when Christians make asinine, ignorant and naive comments attacking those around us or interjecting adjectives completely irrelevant to the topic - listen in most Christian circles today, and you'll know what I'm talking about.

I don't write these things out of anger at my fellow Christians. I write these out of a necessity of accountability with each other, especially myself. We are not called to give staple answers with coworkers or perform service projects biannually when it's convenient. We are called to live a lifestyle that is love. We live within our bubble and go outside of it when it's on the schedule, but I don't think we should have to go outside of the bubble. We are supposed to expand our bubble to include that which we normally would not.

If I were put in the middle of a street with young Christians yelling at gay people on opposite side of the street because the Christians are protesting gay people, I would shamefully join the side of the gay people and befriend them - shamefully only because I claim the same "title" as the yelling youth. If I must be disregarded for sympathizing with the 18-year old mom but not knowing Ephesians 1:4 off the top of my head, I will bow my head. I cannot and will not point my fingers at Christians in particular, because we know who we are. The only anger that should arise from you is when you read this and see me doing differently. Otherwise, take this as a point of reference in how I think we Christians should live and act towards those around us. If it is used to work on your heart and make you question life, that is not my doing; however, I am here to offer my discussion pertaining to this topic.

In closing, I don't say any of these things as a pointed finger away from myself. It may very well be my bad, but I think we Christians look too far down stream in Christianity when we don't adhere to the most important commandments. If the river is polluted at the source, the whole river will become polluted. I've been in Bible studies where people have complained when the study was "too shallow" which was proceeded by endless gossip about people in church. I could have angrily slammed a fist, and I very well may have, if not in my mind. I believe the foundation to a solid Christian life is outward focused - on God and our neighbor - and the inward focus should be secondary, albeit just as necessary.